Am I a good mom?

I wonder sometimes if I'm a good mom. I sit back at the end of the day and think "did I do everything to make each child feel like they are loved?" When I put Samantha to bed each night I always ask her if she had a good day and what her favorite part of the day was. Today she just melted my heart. Today was a bad day for me.
Jim has been working everyday and not getting home until 645p each day. So I'm busy from the time we get up until he gets home. Sometimes I wonder how many times I tell Samantha hold on, I have to feed Nicholas, change Nicholas, calm Nicholas down, put Nicholas to sleep. I wonder if she ever feels like mad or sad that I'm not taking care of her right at the second. Today though I know she doesn't feel that way. Nicholas cried all day today...he's not a cryer at all. I told Samantha hold on a thousand times today. After I had given Nichloas his bath tonight and I was holding him and he was quiet and asleep on me, I just started crying. Crying for no reason at all. Just tired and happy he was finally quiet. Samantha came up next to me with her nursery rhyme book and started telling me what some of them were and then asked me to ready some of them to her. As I was reading them to her, she could see that I was crying. She asked if she could wipe away my tears and told me it was ok. She told me she loved me and gave me a big hug and kiss. This totally melted my heart which in turn made me cry even more. At that point, I knew I was doing what I was supposed to be doing.
Tonight when I put her to sleep she gave me a big hug and kiss and told me the best part of today was making banana bread and me reading books to her. I love this little girl so much and I don't want her to ever lose her spunk or for me to ever crush her spirit. I want her to know everyday that I do the best that I can and make her feel special everyday!

2 months

My sweet little boy is 2 months already! Where did the time go. I guess we have been so busy with Thanksgiving, decorating for Christmas, going to Chicago for Christmas and New Years! These last two months have flown by and you just fit right in! It's like you have always been here. You really are a good baby! Just like your sister you go with the flow! You have had 2 car trips back and forth from Michigan to Chicago and have done great with both of them! You slept the whole the way through.
Your sister is in love with you too! She loves helping me get diapers and when you wake up she brings her step stool close to the crib and tells you "it's ok buddy, mommy is here." Your sister also loves to give you hugs and kisses and snuggle nose.
This month you started sleeping through the night, which to mommy that means 10p-5a and then going right back to sleep until 9a or 10a. You are eating every 3 to 4 hours about 6oz of formula.
Stats:
Weight: 14lbs 5 oz 100 percentile
Heights: 24.5 in 100 percentile

You are getting so big, and love you so much! Can't wait to see what you start doing this next month!

New Year

It was a pretty uneventful New Years Eve in the Kowalczyk household. Samantha, Nicholas and myself drove back on NYE to Michigan so we could at least all be together to ring in the new year. Samantha was very excited to see Jim when he got home from the hospital. We just hung out and the kids were asleep before midnight. Jim and I watched the ball drop and then went to bed ourselves since Jim had to work the next day. I don't know what to expect this next year. In looking back at my past years posts, I see another year of medical school down, graduation, anticipation of a child, trying to sell the condo. I don't have any of these this year. This year it will be Jim finishing up intern year of residency, Samantha starting preschool (how can that be?) and the condo finally being gone, even though it's because of foreclosure :( Oh well at least it will be gone! This is going to be a good year!

Christmas

This is my absoulte favorite holiday! Christmas brings out the kid in me! I love the lights, decorations, innonance of children and the Christmas story. This Christmas was so much fun for me! Samantha is at such a fun age. she loved putting up the lights with me, putting ornaments on the Christmas tree and just asking about Jesus. Last year, Mimi ( jim's mom) bought her Little People Manager scene. I decided to only bring it out at Christmas time. It gives us the chance to talk about the Jesus and His amazing enterance into this world.
This year we also did Elf on the Shelf. Samantha was so confused in the beginning. Our Elf, which Samantha named Buddy, came to our house while Samantha was in the bath one night. I told her that Santa was here and dropped Buddy off to watch her during the day and that he would fly back to the North Pole to report to Santa to see if she was a good girl. In the beginning, she was very scared of Buddy, but as the days went on she got used to him and was excited every morning to see where Buddy was hiding. He had some good hiding spots, from the Christmas tree, to the clock to being locked in the latern. Buddy even rode in the front seat buckled in, of course, to Palos for Christmas.
The Christmas Samantha also LOVED watching the Christmas movies. We watched Rudolph, Frosty, Charlie Brown Christmas, The Grinch (which she was very afraid of The Grinch), Elf on the Shelf. We watched these every morning...I'm glad Christmas is over because they have been magicially erased from the DVR.
So this Christmas Samantha got a lot of wonderful toys. My parents got her clothes for her bitty baby, matching pj's with her bitty baby, some cute summer clothes, style kit which included a blow dryer, curling iron, straightener, brush, fake hair spray and perfume, and a ballet skirt and leotard and slippers. She also got a baby carrier for her babies from Auntie JuJu and Uncle Matt. Uncle Awesome (Jeff) and Auntie Allie got her a clock so she can learn how to tell time and a dog and carrier for her bitty baby. I'm probably forgetting something, but all the gifts were very much appreciated and she LOVES all of them. Nicholas got a rocking horse, Garbage truck just like Papa's, little tool box, clothes, race car steering wheeland Go GO baby crawl toy. I can't wait for him to play with these. Jim's parents got them some great gifts too. Samantha got a space station, LaLaLoopsy dolls and sets, coloring books, crayons, Lion King DVD and a chair & ottomen (so cute). Nicholas got some boy toys, he got Racing Zoomers, cars, clothes and books. Overall it was a great Christmas and we had a lot of fun with all our family in Chicago. Now back in Michigan putting away decorations and getting toys set up and organized. Hope everyone had a blessed Christmas!